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Wedding guide · 敬茶
Chinese Wedding Tea Ceremony Checklist 婚礼敬茶清单
For a Chinese wedding tea ceremony (敬茶) you need: a tea set with teapot and cups, a serving tray, the tea (often sweet, with red dates, longan and lotus seeds), kneeling cushions, double-happiness (囍) décor, and red envelopes for the elders to give. The couple serves the elders in order of seniority, usually the groom’s family first.
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The essentials
Red, gold or 囍-printed porcelain; get enough cups for each pair of elders.
Holds the cups as you kneel or bow to each elder.
Many couples kneel to serve parents and grandparents; a pair of red cushions saves knees and looks lovely in photos.
枣生桂子 (早生贵子): the classic wish for a child soon, steeped into the tea.
百年好合: a hundred years of harmony.
Décor & extras
Window and door stickers, banners and table décor.
Elders give them after the tea; also used for the door games (堵门).
Traditional outfit many brides wear for the tea ceremony.
Order of service (common practice)
- Groom’s parents, then grandparents, then uncles and aunts (eldest first).
- Then the bride’s family, often at her home or later in the day.
- Elders drink, bless the couple, and give red envelopes or jewelry.
- Younger siblings and cousins may serve tea to the couple.
Customs differ between Cantonese, Hokkien, northern and other families; ask the elders how they’d like it done.
Choosing the day: auspicious wedding dates with lucky hours · how families pick a wedding date.
Common questions
What do you need for a Chinese tea ceremony?
A tea set (teapot and cups, often red or with the 囍 character), a serving tray, the tea itself (often sweetened, with red dates, longan or lotus seeds), kneeling cushions, and red envelopes, which the elders give to the couple after drinking.
What tea is used in a Chinese wedding tea ceremony?
Families vary: black or oolong tea, or a sweet tea with red dates (红枣), dried longan (桂圆) and lotus seeds (莲子). Together 枣 and 桂 make the pun 早生贵子, “have a precious child soon”. Lily bulb (百合) stands for 百年好合, a harmonious union for a hundred years.
Who serves tea to whom?
The couple serves tea to their elders, usually the groom’s family first, in order of seniority (parents, then grandparents, uncles and aunts). Elders drink, give their blessing and a red envelope or jewelry. Then the couple may receive tea from younger siblings and cousins.
When do you pick the date for a tea ceremony?
Usually on the wedding day itself, timed to an auspicious hour. See our auspicious wedding dates, which list the lucky hours (吉时) for each recommended day.